Friday, March 19, 2010

Ch Ch Changes....




I have decided that I am going to embark on a journey for the next 6 months, I graduate college in less than 8 weeks and I have been working non-stop for the past 6 months!  I have been thinking a lot about changes that I need to make in my life in order to make myself happy. It seems for the past year I have been go go go taking care of other people instead of myself, and in that I have lost who I really am.  This thought does not make me happy if anything it makes me furious and angry that somewhere in the twist and turns the good and bad, I have lost the most important thing and that is myself.  I know it sounds so not original but I have turned into someone I no longer enjoy being.  I have a great boyfriend and I love my job even though it is not permanent I still have to find a job after graduation that I enjoy and love, I do not want to settle like many of my friends and I know that with the economy the way it is it hard to find anything without exhausting every resource.   So here is the plan I am going to lay out a variety of things that I want to do and change in my life over the next 6 months nothing crazy but simple changes.

1. I need to start taking care of my body
2. I need to expand my mind,  being forced to read 300 page con law books has somewhat diminished my love of reading I need to get that back
3. I need to find my happy place again (I am not depressed but I have been sluggish and sad for a while, I love my life and what it has given me but something has been off for a while)
4. Time to myself has been sparingly sparse I have been on a whirl wind busy schedule barely able to clean my house let alone go grocery shopping.
5. Making myself happy first and foremost...I am a textbook people pleaser and I have let that control parts of my life including my close relationships with people I love.

There are more things to add to this list but for now this is enough I am getting myself ready for this journey of empowerment (if it can even be called that) but it must be something deep.

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